Mason turns 18 years old on Friday and graduates from high school a week later. He was accepted into USC (University of Southern California - his first choice!) and was able to defer for one year. Mason will be moving to LA sometime this summer to pursue his dance career.
Dear Son,
How am I to do this...this letting go of you?
How am I to wake up excited for each day knowing that you and your extraordinary presence will not be here with me?
I wish I could do this gracefully, but I am not sure that I can.
I will miss everything about you.
Your humor and lightness.
The depth and breadth that you feel and think and care and express.
Your technical savvy with electronics.
Your endless questioning about life and its meaning for you and others.
I’ll miss your awesome friends.
The conversations about dance and family and school and girls and the many varied topics that interest you.
Witnessing your artistry as you are in the flow of creation, whether it be choreography or a video.
Watching you research, visit stores, obsess I mean research some more, and then purchase, all in a matter of a few days!
Your hugs and the occasional request to put you to bed.
Your seemingly infinite wellspring of dedication, motivation, interests and passions. You are truly a modern day Renaissance man.
Your discoveries and aha moments in your journey to answer your frequent questions, “What am I doing?” and “Who am I?”
I will miss all of these things with you and about you, more than you can know.
I am grateful for every moment with you, Mason, from the lows of the struggles to the highs of all your successes, and everything in between.
I am not proud to admit that your leaving home creates a void inside of me, thick in sorrow and always weeping, sometimes gently, and often uncontrollably. This void is all my own, not yours, and it is for me to fill. I will start by filling it with the overwhelming gratitude that I have for the amazing man, person, soul that you have become, gratitude for your readiness in going out into the world, and gratitude for the pure bond and love that we share.
In handling your leaving, I may not be graceful, but I am profoundly grateful, and that is a solid start.
Just like you promised me years ago that your hugs and affection would continue after you grew up, I promise you that no matter how grown up you become that forever and always you will be my Mason-man.
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